This I Know

Stumbling through life has it's merits.  I can see this now.  It's messy, uncomfortable at times, enlightening, joyous, heartbreaking and unpredictable.  You never know what you will find.  I should know because that is pretty much how I started my early years and continued well into adulthood.

As the years went by my gait through this journey became more steady, even though I still could not fully grasp what was pulling me or what I was heading towards.  I just kept moving along.  I was chasing dreams, running from failure, or just moving ahead because I didn't know what else to do.  I always had this idea that whatever I felt in my heart I was searching for was just over the horizon.

Now this isn't bad.  I did learn a lot of useful things along the way when I took the time to think about it.  I learned valuable life skills, got an idea how the world works, had many different types of relationships.  I expanded my mind as I expanded my living experience.  But I always had this feeling that I was chasing something that I could not name.  Some part of myself that was ahead, totally in control and just waiting for me to catch up.

Now all along this wonderful, painful and sometimes very unsteady journey;  I could sense my Inner Guidance trying to come through.  And it helped a lot.  I developed a deep faith in my Spirituality which gave me a calmer and more stable approach.  But I didn't always take the time to listen.  I was chasing something "out there", not paying attention to what was inside of me.  

Finally, I took the time to listen.  I mean truly listen to what was within me.  And it took my breath away.  The simplicity of it to my preconditioned my mind was amazing yet complicated at the same time.  But I kept slowing down long enough to "listen" and the truth I was sensing in it resonated more and more with me.  

I finally got it.  All this searching and running after what I was supposed to be doing, what I was supposed to look like, accomplishing and experiencing was not helping me find what I needed.  I realized it was like looking for my glasses while they have been resting on my head the entire time.  

I let life catch up and catch on.  I made the decision to live life in this moment, where I am now.  Instead of searching, I am observing and noticing things I always overlooked in my haste to get to the next phase or place in my life.  I discovered that there is a deep sense of curiosity for many things I overlooked before.  

What I will do with this realization; I am not sure.  I will grow into it and see where it takes me.  I will see what  I can observe, experience, meet and learn as I walk with my life step by step.  Moment by moment.  

This I know.

The Truth about Forgiveness

As I mentioned before; I have learned so much about myself the last three years.  The Good, Bad and the Ugly.  Yes indeed some of it was very ugly.  But I needed to know, to see in order to free myself of a few more chains holding me in the prison I made for myself.

One of the most important things I now know is the importance of "Forgiveness".  I never could really get this.  Someone does something to me and it's my responsibility to forgive them??  That's nonsense!  Or so I thought.  All the slights;perceived or otherwise, insults, rejections, resentments, gossip, underhanded dealings that I carried around with me for so many years.  One or the other would come to the forefront whenever a certain emotion triggered the place I had all of these buried.

One or another of these repressed nuggets would surface..all the bigger for sitting inside me for so long.  Until one day I realized I had repeated this process for so long that I actually could sense a physical response in my body when the right emotion triggered this repressed mess.  Neuro peptides had been formed because of this.

Then I got it.  The importance of "Forgiveness" was for me.  To help me let go of the jumbled mess inside me.  To stop the ,"I am the victim/martyr of all time," nonsense.  To stop allowing these actions along with the people connected to them to have any hold on me.  Forgiveness was the only way.  It made even more sense when I took it a step further.  People don't plan to ruin someone's day or do mean underhanded things.  Unless they are just bat crap crazy.  No, most of the time it is their fear..and the ideology of victim hood they are carrying around.  So why would I allow someone's weak moment of meanness to have some strange hold on me for years?  Wow.

We become what we resent and fear in others because we are fearful of being resented.  It's a vicious cycle.  And everyone who is human is wired to do this.

I have learned to forgive for my own well being and it is so freeing.  Why did it take me so long.????




 My mind does not always tell me the truth.  It's not intentional.  It's my emotions/ego trying to make me feel better..by allowing my mind to pick out facts and information that support my own preconditioning.  In other words, it's telling me what I want to believe.  That's not necessarily the truth.  Sometimes observing with objectivity is scary and painful.  Shakes up your world and what you want to believe.   But the there really is more than one side to every situation.

“Marathon” or “Foeniculum Vulgare"

Back in 490 BC the Greeks and Persians were battling in a field of fennel, the plains of marathon.  Marathon meaning fennel.

Roman soldiers chewed Fennel for increased endurance.  Later on the Puritans called it “the meeting seed”.    Many of the congregation would chew fennel seeds to ward off sleepiness and hunger during long church services.

Fennel seeds are miraculous,  fragrant and tasty little pods of medicinal goodness and can be found in any grocery store in the spice section. Chewing 10 to 15  fennel seeds once or twice a day are helpful to the body in many ways.

Fennel  speeds up the digestive process.  This is especially good for those who suffer with Type 2 Diabetes.  Frequently people with type 2 Diabetes develop a slowing down of peristalsis, which is the muscle movement of the intestine in the digestive process to move waste down to be expelled.    This disorder is called Gastro Paresis.  Chewing fennel seeds will help alleviate this by acting as an antispasmodic and helping the digestive juices do their work.

Fennel helps alleviate indigestion, improves pancreatic function.  It is also used for Irritable Bowel Syndrome, nausea, diarrhea, coughs from colds or bronchitis.

These little seeds will enhance energy levels, act as a diuretic.

Fennel seeds are also good for suppressing appetite if taken before meals.  Chew 10 to 15 seeds before meals and you will feel full faster and eat less.

I chew the seeds and also make them into a tea form.

Fennel is one of my  most used “Kitchen Medicine Goto  items.  These are the basics on how to utilize this wonderful seed.

Fennel Tea ( Tisane) with Honey

Boil 2 or 3 cups of water

Crush 2 teaspoons of Fennel seed with a spoon and add to boiling water.  Turn off heat and steep for 5 to 10 minutes.

You can strain the seeds or leave them in the tea.  Add honey for taste.

This tastes good and is a great digestive aid.  Also good for colds and bronchitis.

This information is intended for your general knowledge only and not a substitute for professional medical advice or treatment specific to medical conditions.  If you are pregnant, breastfeeding, have a chronic or serious illness, and /or have many sensitivities and allergies check with your doctor before using Fennel.

Riding the Wind, Flowing with Water

I can't believe it is October.

Summer was wonderful.  Green, lush and bountiful.  I harvested so much Jewelweed, Plantain, Dandelions, Red clover, Passion flower, Mint, Sage and, of course, Boneset.  This is the summer I learned to make soap.  And I honed my salve/ointment making skills.

I worked on several personal projects since the last time I wrote.  I taught some Reiki classes,  I gave some lectures on Kitchen Medicine.  I spent some time writing a few tutorials on healing with energy and plant medicine.

I began taking yoga classes which now feel absolutely necessary to me.  I even took up belly dancing again.  Nothing moves previously ignored muscles like belly dancing.

This summer was the official "coming out" of my ointments and salves.  I sold quite a few and actually have requests for more.  Amazing.  I love making them so much.  I chose three and focus my intent on them.  Plantain, Jewelweed and Cayenne.

In retrospect, I can see that "Expansion" was the theme of this summer.  Branching out and sharing what I have learned about healing and learning more.  There is no better teacher than connecting with others and stepping into previously unknown experiences.

I didn't sit down and plan all of this.  Everyday I just seemed to flow from one step to another.

This summer brought a lot of changes.  And it was not without challenges.  I still struggle with some issues relating to everyday life.   Personal dilemmas that are connected to the deep deep part of me.
Daily meditations and self treatment with Reiki aid my processing of these things.  And allow me to follow the patterns of the wind and water that appear to be moving me along.  Continue my growth and expansion while simultaneously processing my dilemmas.

This ability alone has taught me so much about how our healing practices aid us through life.  Things that used to shut me down for days now cause detours that I am slowly able  navigate through  with  no outright blockages.  I am so grateful for learning  (remembering) how to do this.

Many lessons I have learned in just a few short months.  The most recent lesson I learned today.

Yesterday I attended a really wonderful Healing Arts Fair in Fayetteville, WV.  I have attended a few in my lifetime in Virginia.  This was a special one for many reasons.  It was the first one held in this area.  And it was the first time I have ever participated,  It was amazing!

I gave Aura and Chakra Strengthening Treatments with Reiki and gave short tutorials about the importance of circulating life force throughout our etheric bodies.   I sold some of my ointments.  I met so many wonderful people.  I was amazed at how many people came.  I loved being part of it.
It was breathtaking to me.   Something I previously only dreamed of doing..I did.

My zeal caused me to overextend myself.  ...The pure delight of being part of something this huge and important to me overrode my good sense..  It was my own fault.  I was like a kid in a candy store.

It began at 11am.    I lost track all track of time after 2pm.   My friend and "Fen Shui" expert had to leave then.  She had taken the things I brought with me and made an amazing treatment area for me.  More on that another time.   Anyway after she left I just kept doing treatments.  I was so involved with it.  Until some alert sounded in me as I was finishing up what would be my last treatment of the day.

And when I gained some awareness of time and space I knew I had to stop, pack up and go home.  Drunk with energy work,  exhaustion from standing for hours, light headed from not eating or drinking enough...I took the time while grounding myself and drinking some water in my car before driving home to acknowledge that I learned a valuable lesson.  And I will heed it.  I knew intellectually that with energy work there has to be space in between treatments,  drink water, ground myself often and limit the treatments to a certain number of people per day.  But I never was in a situation exactly like that and I didn't monitor myself well enough.  Too much of a good thing will wear you out.

So today I am taking it easy.  I have no choice.  I am still feeling the effects of my venture.  I had many things I wanted to do today..but it's not happening.

Was it worth it?  ABSOLUTELY!  I am so grateful for yesterday at the Healing Arts Fair. What a blessing it was.   I will never forget it my whole life.  This summer has  shown me other doors that had been waiting to be opened by me that I couldn't see before.  I was too busy trying to bang on the ones that have shut in my face.
And I am definitely going to do this again.  With moderation and mindfulness.

So I say goodbye to Summer and welcome the Fall that arrived a couple of weeks ago.  I am thankful for all the things I experienced, the blessings I received and new wisdom I have acquired.

What is my next plan?  Right now I am going to take my puppy (who is no longer a puppy) for a walk in my little hollow.  Take some deep cleansing breaths of the cool air and admire the myriad of colors in the trees.  I will ground, center and revive myself.

I will "ride the wind", "flow with water" and confer with my Inner Guidance.   And see where it takes me.   Utilize the things I have learned and experience more lessons I need to learn.

The End of Winter

It's been a long, snowy and cold winter for most of us.  Here in the mountains of West Virginia it was.  Once again I seem to go into hibernation mode.

I haven't written for a long time because it appears that winter time is part of my deeply contemplative mode.  And contemplate I did.  In fact, there were times I didn't want to but the long cold days demanded it.

During this time I spent a lot of time with my growing puppy, Jackson.  I managed to stay connected with friends.  I helped my husband prepare for his long and bitter cold nights on top of Coal River Mountain.  And many hours were spent reading.

In March I traveled to Richmond to meet friends in Virginia for a concert.  It was wonderful yet strange.  I helped teach a couple of Reiki classes and my herbal classes resumed.   I meditated a lot and gave Reiki to myself, everyone around me and everything around me.

My husband and I made it though the winter without any illness.  A couple of times we had some beginning symptoms of a virus or cold.  Thankfully, using Reiki and plant medicine we were able to lose it quickly.  Surprisingly so.

The most important activity of the winter was continued emotional healing.  I was able to work through a large amount of anxieties and pain acquired during the incredibly difficult years of my life.  Things that were buried deeply inside me worked their way to the surface.  It wasn't fun and many times I tried to fight it.  However, I finally realized what was happening and stopped resisting.  I let it happen.  Although it was very painful at times it was a great experience in the long run.

I am able to see things from a wider perspective and it has given me a higher level of compassion for the human condition.  The situations people have to endure at times is heartbreaking.   And with this I learned to listen.  No longer trying to "fix things"; I finally got it that the most important act of compassion is to listen.  Allowing a wounded person to bear witness to their pain is sometimes the most compassionate action there is.  And maybe the most healing.   Bearing witness is acknowledging.   I learned that one of the most important steps of emotional and spiritual healing is to acknowledge and legitimize the pain.

Once the pain is on the table then the work of healing can begin.

That's what I learned this winter.  

Stormy Days

I woke up this morning with strange aching around my neck and the back of my head.  My heart center feels "lumpy and tender".  I sense a stream of something coming up through my second chakra...through my solar plexus..into my aching lumpy heart center.  It feels like frustration with a bit of impatience thrown in.  The least amount of effort seems to be too much.

As I attempt to pull my "Self" away from this hotbed  of misery long enough to observe and assess the situation; I notice this overwhelming stream of sadness coming over me and then I burst into tears.  So now I am aching and tearful and I have absolutely no reason why.

I have worked at processing my emotions for so long that I have condtioned myself not to rely on "triggering situations" to provide the reason.  I am stymied.    I don't have a clue as to why I feel so awful this morning.  I can't even identify any "triggering"  sensations or situations that precipitated this dilemma.


I will admit that they crying wave brought me a sense of inner relief but still I have no idea what caused the sobbing fit.  I do feel calmer and less frustrated and impatient.  But I do sense a mild and quiet sadness has settled in me a bit.  My neck and head are still aching.

I am trying to just sit with this and not resist.  To observe the patterns of the energy movement and my responses while giving myself  Reiki as a supportive compassionate action.   I will consciously circulate my energy to prevent blockages.  I will be kind to myself.

This storm will eventually pass and maybe I will learn something new about my "self".  

The Eyes Have It

Eyes are wondrous organs. They serve us in so many amazing ways, many we are not even aware of. Eyes are busy every second of our waking lives. They not only help us see our surroundings but they allow others to see our truer selves, beyond the defensive facade we present to this physical plane.

Our eyes are busy and sometimes they become strained. From carrying our emotional stress, doing close up work on electronic devices daily, viewing the multiple stimuli that happens around us every minute of the day and just being open for too long without a rest.

I used to take my eyes for granted. I was, of course, aware of their importance to the human body in an intellectual way. I used them constantly without acknowledging or giving a thought to how strained they might be. . I wasn't aware until I began practicing Reiki.

The first time I placed my hands over my eyes with the intent to ease the physical and emotional stress of my eyes; I could not believe the immense sense of relief I sensed deep in my eyes, reaching far down into the other parts of my body. It literally caused tears to form and fall. From that initial experience of actually focusing on my eyes with a healing intent, I realized the magnitude of importance my eyes have over my life.

I could sense for the first time the connection my eyes have with not only physical vision but subtle energies. How the power of my eyes connects with my energy centers of my body.

After that I began incorporating “eye care” into my daily energy cleansing and aura circulating practices. I, of course, give my eyes “energy healing” treatments. My method of choice is Reiki. But there are many other modes of “energy healing” which are just as effective. The goal is to ease the stress and strain of our eyes.

Other methods of relieving eye strain and stress are aromatheraphy, massaging the forehead and face, cold compresses , eye exercises, and taking a break from close up work, closing your eyes and taking deep breaths. Merely placing the palms of your hands over your eyes is soothing and healing.

There are so many methods to achieve the goal of easing our beautiful orbs. The most important thing is that we remember to incorporate them into our daily routines of self care. Because the eyes have it and manage it all for us.