Friday, October 14, 2011

The Hive, The Web, The Nest

I moved to my house last November. Since the house was left to me by my parents, I actually began clearing out and trying to organize a year or so before this. I gave away almost two rooms of furniture, clothes and small appliances. Then when I actually moved to West Virginia I gave away over half of my things in Virginia.

Still I was cramped and it looked overcrowded. So I culled the whole thing and donated another room full of stuff. I kept the things that I just could not bear to part with for various reasons.

I have an office that is crammed with things. Ok, I can live with that. We can walk around and maneuver. The room is serviceable and all our papers are in one place along with our computers. The room is pleasant despite being crowded. The rest of house is orderly and not crowded looking.

Then my partner moved his collections to the house.

Well to make a long story short, my spare bedroom became a storage room of boxes. Ugh! It started to bother me. In fact it bothered me so much that I put off clearing out a small outbuilding beside the garage until I get some order in there.

I began yesterday after I got my partner off to work. I emptied the large closet, vacuumed and dusted it out and put the boxes of my mothers knicknacks in the closet. ( I just cannot get rid of them heart won't let me even though I don't want them lying around all over the house)

That is as far as I got. The room looks like it was bombed. I am amazed at the amount of stuff that closet held. Even though it is large.

At 2 am I stopped. I haven't gone back in there. I am stumped about what to do with all that stuff. I am confused and undecided. I have found three bags and one box that I will definitely take to the Salvation Army. The rest?? I don't know. Then I got to thinking about other changes I wanted to make. But I am not decorator and I want to make use of the things that are here.

I do not have the income I had in Virginia. So I have to be very frugal.

Ok..this is going somewhere I promise! But this is just to kind of explain where I am right now.

I got up this morning and was sitting on my back porch. It is a beautiful day. I did my morning prayer/meditation/Reiki thingie. After expressing gratitude for all of my many blessings. (let's face present dilemma is a joyous one compared to the awful things I lived through in the past years.)

I then asked for guidance to make my thinking and focus clearer when arranging my house. And asked my Guides to give me some direction about the best way to sell some of the things I am willing to give up.

I decided to practice conscious projection again and I began my journey where I saw the man glowing green with the copper head traveling beside him.

see: Really Gone to Ground this Time (September 8, 2011)

Grandmother Spider

I saw him but he was walking out of his little cave into the sunlight. I could hear the water fall and see the trees, grass and flowers. I think I may have gone into some kind of vivid dream state. I followed him until we got to a huge spider web. The spider was the size of a house cat with gray and silver bristles. She was beautiful.

The man with the copper head beside him stopped and gestured to her with his arms and inclined his head. He told her she was beautiful. I bowed my head respectfully but didn't say anything.

She climbed down her web and looked at me. I sat on the ground in front of her. I was kind of skittish but reminded myself that I was in an interesting dream. She spoke to me but not in a voice I could hear. It was like listening to her from a phone in my ear and head. She said this," I do not make my web to compare to other webs. I weave it for my own pleasure and use.
When I find and focus on my own design then my web is pleasing, useful and perfect for me.

The glowing man got up, he and his copper head moved down a path. I thanked the spider and tried to catch up.

Lady Honey Bee
I found him in front of a huge hive. The bees were moving all around it. I stayed very still.
A very large red bee came out and buzzed around us. I bowed my head and sat. I was a little surprised that I didn't get swarmed because the bees were very very close to me.

She hovered near me. I could smell her in the dream. It was familiar but kind of elusive. Like a mixture of cooked corn and apples. That is the best way I can describe it. It was very pleasant. Her buzzing was deep and I could feel it in all my energy centers. I didn't hear any words but I found words in my head, like a head text. The words were, "A home needs balance. Here the drones do their work and I do mine and we create harmony. If you are a Queen without drones then your home will be out of sync. Too much comfort without order leaves no place for the workings of the spirit.

If you are a drone without a Queen, too much order without comfort leaves no place for nurturing the spirit.

You must be the balance between the Queen and the drone for comfort, order and growth of the spirit.

I thanked the Queen Bee and her drones and continued to follow the man with the copper head.

Father Crow

I followed him to an opening in the trees. It looked a lot like a spot I sit in up my little hollow. I sat on the rock with the man and waited. I heard the crows cawing back and forth and smiled. Because I love that.

As I was thinking that a large crow flies down and stands in front of the rock I am sitting on. I felt a big feeling of happiness in my heart. He was very large and black. I greeted him with my voice. I could hear it clearly in my dream. I said," Hello Father Crow". I bowed my head respectfully. He began to make loud cawing noises and the other crows began flying from tree to tree. The large crow said nothing to me but a feeling like a long lost memory surfaced. The flying and cawing made something come from inside me.

Make my nest as strong, comfortable and protective for me and my loved ones as I can, but never become so attached to it that it calls your attention away from life. Be ready to fly into life with wonder and a sense of adventure. The nest is very important but my true home is carried in my heart connected to those around me. Not a place or things. Home is a state of being.

I thanked the crow verbally. I said, "Thank you Father Crow." That's all I could get out.

My dog kind of woke me up then. It started as a meditation but it became like some sort of dream state. This is the second time this has happened while I was up and fully awake but meditating. I kind of like it and what a difference it made! So much so that even though it sounded crazy I HAD to put it here.

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