Monday, May 2, 2011

A Contemplative Day

My life is so much more peaceful right now than I can ever remember. I am filled with Gratitude that I have time and space to move along at my own pace. To take time to contemplate and meditate when I feel the urge.

Oh, and I did find that book again. It was back in the bookshelf. I found it today. Hmmm...I am not even going to think about how or why it showed up. I showed my Significant personage and he laughed when I asked if he put it there. I took that as a yes and began to get wound up about how I searched and searched for it. He swears he did not touch it..he just finds me amusing when I get worked up over things. Well so the mystery remains.

Anyhow that's for another day. As I was saying. I meditated a lot today. I went to Beckley and took my library books back, stopped at the health food store and splurged on my fave elderberry tea which I am pleased to say is available. And I found the incense I like to burn.

As I mentioned before, the love of my life is supporting me financially right now and we are on a tight budget. Like kids starting out instead of middle aged people. ha! It's kind of fun. And we have a beautiful place to live..so much greenness. The mountains are breathtaking. I love them!


I signed up for some free water aerobics and free yoga. Wow...because I am over 50! Again, I thank God, Goddess, Creator for these blessings. I still haven't found a Reiki share group. But I will. And anyway I give Reiki all day long. I am really looking forward to when I am guided to Teach it.

I finally got my WV nursing license in the mail today. With a notice that it must be renewed immediately. What? I just got it. Oh well..I went ahead..got online and renewed it. Acceptance and all of that.

I am pleased with the life we are making here. It's still all new and different ..unsettling and sometimes anxiety producing but I am where I am supposed to be. I don't know what for but I am here. I am living and moving under Guidance. However, that does not mean that I don't have those days, moments and minutes when I get anxious, impatient, fearful and bitchy.

I purposely and mindfully made the decision when I was in my 40's to make friends and embrace my "dark side". To stop shoving her away but to allow her to work with my whole being. To utilize the gifts my dark side brings to me. That was a great step for me but there are days when I fall into the old pattern and wham. You know the drill. But I am aware and its ok. I will keep working with and merging with my "dark side". We need each other.

One thing I do know is the atmosphere of the "Inner Planes" is heightened. I am receiving large influxes of energy when I meditate. I don't know what it means. But I am remaining mindful.
On the other hand in the physical realm I find the energies fluctuating more than usual. With an undertone of electrical heaviness that is more pronounced than before.

I wanted to sit down for a few minutes and just quietly go over the tarot cards. I don't generally do readings anymore at least for myself. I sometimes just lay cards down that I feel I need to and gaze at them. They have a language all of their own and the pictures tell me stories..Not necessarily what the books say. (I haven't been able to use tarot books for a few years to interpret the cards) The words come one at a time in my head..sometimes not words but flashes of scenes like a movie trailer. But today it was a no go. More and more my "Inner Guidance" is moving me away from using the cards. "They" seem to be urging me to develop a stronger inner discernment or something. I don't understand. I have faith that deep down I know but consciously I don't understand.

It always brings me back to something my "Guides" told me years ago. About the importance of: Do without doing, knowing without understanding why. I used to be so perplexed over this but I am starting to get it a little.

Contemplation for another day.

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